Things to Ponder
1. I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
2. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
3. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
4. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
5. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
6. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
7. Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
8. Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
9. I intend to live forever - so far, so good.
10. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
11. 24 hours in a day ... 24 beers in a case.....coincidence?
12. When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
13. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
14. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
15. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
16. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
17. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
18. For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
19. No one is listening until you make a mistake.
20. Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.